pretty pictures

pretty pictures...

some photos i took when i was in Fajar... heh heh my lovely bunch of Fajar colleagues...

Group photo...

This is Joseph Giri n i... lame. He just makes my day everyday in there. Strong brother too...

This is erman... very funky n blur art teacher...
hahah no lar, he is realli very nice. hor erman?

This is Eugene... the nice PE teacher.. thank u for introducing all sorts of farni games to us together with joe-si. if not life will be so boring without u guys. hahaha... man i miss those times with u guys, and u guys are so lucky to go back to Fajar.. humph... haaha help me take care of my precious students. thank u so much...

and this is me.... lynn helped me tie my hair into a french braid today before youth service. nice rite?... hee so nice, i also want to tie by myself.

21 more days...

21 more days to go...

man, it feels like a month already.. hahaha... will time ever pass faster... u noe ar, the farni thing about time is that when u want it to pass faster, it just delays and drags till the cows come home.. den, when u want time to come to a standstill, it passes like a choo choo train or rather in the blink of an eye...

Today Pastor Gerald led the youth worship service. it was awesome man... i think it was one of the best worship sessions with such an intimacy with God i ever had ever since i stepped into church. We had no proper structure so we literally had to rely on Pastor Gerald for cues to the direction that we're heading for. This is what worship should be so i guess the youths still have lots to learn. haha but of coz, i noe it can't be done overnight. so duh!!! but all i ask n pray is for a teachable and a willing-to-learn spirit as well as attitude.

yeah.. so lucky lor mr. yang gets to go to san francisco.. ahhaha. mummy said she wants the whole of san francisco so that she can share with zg... not fair lor. den me lei? muahahha.. dun worry, i own the whole earth coz i'm royalty. since God is King, den i'm princess. haha oops just following hierachy ma... hahha ok ppl, i got to go... gng to watch another hindi movie soon after i finish msning some precious person. heh heh... *winks* yeah.

Man... i totally miss Fajar Sec... totally

Life goes on........

hurray!!!

22 more days...

ok i think i had better clear what is bothering me or making me frustrated. it is mostly church related nothing to do with anyone or frens in other areas other than church. can't be bothered with trivial matters. yup.. it is more like a tugging at my heart for the ministry.

anyway, yest went out with Jonathan Tan for dinner coz mummy n daddy went to church for some church cell leader's meeting haha. yup. some pictures of my godbro n i... hee

my piggy faced god bro n i..

ok lar... i shall not be so mean.. this is how my godbro realli looks like.. quite handsome hor... but he very poor thing, always being bullied by all his gfs... *sayang* nvm bro, i help u filter out and vet thru all ur Mrs. Tan-to-be. hee

this was a pic we took at hotel intercontinental.. at the lounge bar... heh heh... yup, he's one of my good frens till this very day since secondary sch...

oh yeah!!! and i passed my advanced theory. woohoo!!! all i need now is to work hard for the driving test... heh heh.. thank u so much daddy God.. Daddy God, i promise that i will be a very safe driver. i will always drive ppl up the wall. now n 4eva alwayz... heh...

and yay!!! 22 more days to 2 major events, the welcoming home of mr. yang and the Youth Evangelical Service... which i hope by God's grace, will not be another performance by the band but will be a true worship session that will touch the lives of many others... and may they see, feel and know that God is real... amen!!

gosh 26 more days...

26 more days...

yay!!! the uncle yang called.. haha so exciting... oh well.. he has just left for the conference.. so happy for him. just awaiting for his return to settle some other stuff too lor... hee got nth much to say as my heart is getting heavier each day... trust me, it has nth to do with mr. yang's overseas trip to U.S. but i guess Chris, u noe what i'm toking abt...

it is like a bursting ball of fire struggling to burst forth from me... nevertheless, i must control my fury...

ok happy thots... must think happy thots... cannot dwell on saddening and infuriating stuff. if not, there will be no end... happy thots... haha. i noe!!!!!!!!!!! pretty pictures!!! hahaha... wait ar... (pictures are right below this entry)...

Today (as in Wed), i had a wonderful dinner with Aunty Gwen and my bro zk... we went to sakae sushi n den chilled at coffee bean... i tell u, we shared so much about our life and i would say she is one lady that i truly salute... she is a very strong christian... i admire her for standing her ground when the principals n values of God are being compromised. something that i learned. she will just speak her mind. i think it is essential that we speak our minds knowing that we do it out of love and for the good of His people even though it seems to be done at the expense of breaking them down or like the phrase, iron sharpens iron... it is thru brokenness that we truly learn. i've been there, exprienced that... nt a nice feeling but God is in control... a true learning experience...

Another wonderful thing that i learnt from her during dinner at Sakae was that she called the waitress by her name... it was an eye opener. i mean who on earth would bother a name tag and the name on it. but aunty Gwen did it. After she addressed the waitress her name, i realized that hey ppl in the service industry are actually humans too n they do have a name... It makes ppl feel important, respected and loved...

oh hahaha n the same waitress addressed my bro zk, "Sir, what drink would u like to have"? when we sat down. muahahaha... i tell u my bro, freaked out as we kept teasing him the entire nite... poor zk... *sayang* not bad ar, got ppl address him as Sir... aahhaah...

yeah some photos... man i think i'm totally narcissist... cool!!!

oh n before i end, i would like to add that the spirit of JOY n HAPPINESS is essential to the worship ministry... now it feels like it is a burden to serve and i can feel barriers and walls put up around each person when it comes to practice time or soundcheck... where's the joy? i think i shall unleash my happiness and just be myself for once instead of being so constipated, trying to be as sane as i can be... no more sane nat... i shall be myself for once... MAD!!!

Is God in control?

Is God in control or wat?

fine.. a little updates before i say what is truly bugging in my heart deep down within... firstly, today went by super slow.. i have no idea why lar.. maybe it is because, my dear mr. yang has left for U.S for a supernatural conference... very exciting... haha. missing him is an understatement of the mnth lar.. but on the bright side, i guess 3 weeks will go past very fast if i find things to occupy myself with.

luckily for me, my day started at 6pm, right after dinner where i had a jamming session with my bros first.. we played battle cry... man, it brings fond memories when we were in the other church... hahaa at abt 7pm, when we were quite mad and high my godsis, deniece came to join us in the jamming session... coz we're gng to perform a few sentimental songs at esplanade on sun... ok lar... it was quite gao wei initially coz suddenly, she can't flow with us n vice versa plus she brought her own fren in... hahaha. oh well, it was fun... after she left, zk, zg, n i had a fun time arranging songs, changing rhythms from 4/4 rock to funk to bossa nova and back to rock... had a fun time worshipping God by ourselves again. man, this is something that i miss.. to be able to reach, taste n God's presence. It has been a long time since i ever experienced a super high worship... which brings me to what is egging me in my heart the past few months...

sometimes ar, i seriously wonder why God put me back in Coos... tho i noe the reason but must He really do that? i enjoy worshipping together with bros, jonathan and barnabus... man that was the bomb man of worships... super high...i mean sometimes, i feel that we put God in a box... We play God instead. if u restrict God to what u noe, then aren't u God? when worshipping... one does not need to follow a rigid structure... Let God flow.. it is something that i have not been able to experience here in Coos...
and what is with the complicated song arrangements? half cut, here, full cut there? it just complicates things... no band dynamics? why? ask me n i will tell u how and where the problem lies... i can go on n on... there will be no end... i will say my piece when the time is ripe... for now, i shall keep my mouth shut.

What is worship and music? let me tell u...
Worship and music comes from the heart... True worship to God means u let Him take control... When the music or worship is in chaos, that is where God is happy.. coz He is in control. He can do what He wants... not some fancy band arrangement with wonderful techniques to make ppl feel good...
and music for worship? just keep it simple and lively with a balanced range of lows, mids n highs... with nice layering of instruments and creative but simple arrangements and cuts...
Who cares whether the song arrangment is good when the congregration can't follow? who cares if u got experience in playing with outside gigues or concerts... is the ability to play n worship God based on all these? if it is, think again.. u have got ur doctrine n concept wrong. wat rubbish...

u want a breakthru? sure easy... let God lead... apart from that... ATTITUDE is the key to everything... wat emo shit... emo my foot. trying to sound like a sonic edge band is crap pls. forgive me but we have to define our own style. u have a congregation, so adapt to their needs.. stop imitating other bands, get a life.

Where we are serving is the sacred, holiest house of God.. it is a ministry. dun take it for granted or assume it is a place to gain recognition. being in a ministry takes sacrifice n hard work n commitment... commitment is what i see... what is ur motive behind u serving in a ministry? define it pls. only then can u give God ur best... tons of things to be set in order in this house of God.. TONS!!! but who will receive n learn with an open heart n mind? dun resist God pls... a much greater work is gng to take place.. another level up into the spiritual realm is what i see n feel strongly in my spirit. a breakthru will come but it depends on how we work together to fight this battle... a servant attitude n spirit is required in any ministry... an essential one...

another reminder... dun use music to manipulate the emotions of ppl. i know and i can sense it when it happens... Beware... just let God lead... trust Him... and if u think u noe what is music n worship? think again...

today...

June 7, 2007

shall do a little recap here since yesterday i was not realli in a mood to blog coz was a wee bit excited. hee.

I am thankful to daddy God for seeing dot dot n i thru our drama auditions.. thank you mummy, chris, dotdot's mummy and zk for ur prayers for us to get thru it. thank you so so much... yup. after which, dot dot came over to my house for lunch and i experimented on her the cheese rice together with my bro. i'm sure it was nice, if not that woman would not have soaked her rice into cheese lor. i mean who would pour soup into a bowl of cheese rice? well, DOROTHY did it lar. hahah quite farni lar... it looked milk cheese rice soup or smth... *eww gross* heh heh... after lunch, we jammed n watched our all time favourite hindi movie. Kal ho Naa ho... so touching... I CRIED!!! N i got laughed at by my bro zg n my mum. so paisei... *piang*

anyway, dot dot is a talented drummer though... hee had fun jamming with her n bro... man i love my dot dot.

Today....

i had a fun time today.. spent time with mr. yang... lalalalala.... hee.. ok fine, i am uber happy lar but yet sad... let's start with happy k?

Happy bcoz, today i got to spend time with him after his 5 day trip from malacca n we watched an uber cute show called shrek 3 ARGH!!! baby shreklets are so cute lar.. honestly ar, i felt that the 1st n 2nd show were the best. the 3rd one was a little lame n predictable. it was the shreklets that made the show all worth it. but who cares... hee. i am happy.

Sad why? coz i have only 4 days left to see him and that hurts. coz he is flying off to U.S for another mnth. man!!! i thank God for the gradual testings and the little getting used to.. but oh well, i am strong n can bear with it by God's grace n dot dot's lameness and wonderful friendship.. thank u seng... heh. coming to niam u le... muahahahah... love u gal.

anyway, shall leave u a couple of pictures that the uncle n i took.. muahahah

happy day...

my happy day....

Firstly, let me thank my Daddy God for watching over me and providing me the entrance to degree programme at NIE and helping me at drama auditions today.. i was truly excited and grateful to Him. Without Him, i am totally nth... Nonetheless, i am thankful to you Jesus...

today's drama audition was quite fun. it felt like lessons have already begun. we were required to move our bodies according to music using body parts such as the elbow, legs and butts.. quite embarassing but wat to do, just whack lar, my life depends on it man... hahah..

Thank God that i only have 1 mnth to teach at Si Ling before degree programme starts. I still miss my Fajar kids so so much.. it hurts to go past that sch n yet noe that i am no longer gng back there.. To fajarians reading this, i love u with all my heart... more than u ever noe... :)

another happy thing is that my dear Mr. Yang is back!!! woohoo!!! get to hear his nice nice voice le... hahaha he reminds me of papa. heh heh... oops... haha. anyway, welcome home dear Chris... oh well, i only get to see him for say 4 more days and then he's off again to U.S for 1 mnth... another challenging feat for me. oh well, God will bring us thru it amen...

hahaha... ok tat's all folks... gng to watch tv now.. tata muackz

1 more day and counting...

1 more day n counting the hours....

so exciting... tmr is the most exciting day... firstly, would be the drama auditions which i pray very hard that i will be accepted. By God's grace, i will enter... Amen to tat!! and secondly, my dear Mr. Yang will be coming home in less than 24 hours. yay!!! and i am getting ready to nag him to the doctor's heh heh...

Oh well, was supposed to meet deniece today but we didn't meet up in the end coz it was too late n i guess she is prob tired after church camp.. and oh, i made a wonderful discovery... i love eating milo powder. it is the yummiest comfort food one can ever have when no proper food is in sight. hahha...

MILO POWDER MILO POWDER!!! YUM!!! i tell u i think milo has gone a long way back into history man.. from the nostalgic milo van to the milo can to the fancy milo drinks that we see in prata shops such as the al-ameen prata restaurant... cool ar, imagine that our humble milo drink turned into a star, popular among young teenagers and finding favour among adults too... haha.

Evolution of milo drink...

brings back memories eh?

queuing up for milo at the van

by the way.. maroon 5 has just released their new album.. I WANT!!!!!!!! i think the song is so nice lar.. their new song is so nice... is the title makes me wonder...super nice lar so must get it ok ppl? yup n when u want to buy it, pls think of me here drooling over their new album.. haha.. ok maroon 5, where are my fees for helping u advertise ur new album eh? hand the mullah over NOW!!! heh heh...

TAT'S ALL FOR NOW FOLKS!!! LOVE U PPL!!! *MUACKIES*

one simple telephone call....

hahah.. firstly, let me start off today's entry with a big thank you... THANK YOU JESUS 4 everything that u have done for me since day 1 of my birth till today. thank u so much... THANK YOU DADDY SO SO SO SO MUCH!!! Bless you so so much... :) it means so much to me. thank you for knowing the desires of my heart and many more!! :)

hee... God is so good.. yup, today i guess it was not bad as yesterday... partly coz i think i'm getting used to it le and also there's about 1 more day to go? ... but still weird.. heh heh... a dear person called yest and today, and hahaha i am estatic. Mr. Yang, thank you for everything heh heh... and if u're reading this, i'm awaiting for ur return for many things. one of them is for u to send me the pictures taken on last fri. hee...

haha... it's exactly 11.30pm on my lappie... and in half an hour's time it would be 12am, which means 1 more day!!! yay!!! God pls help me on thursday... i realli need you.. thank u...

can't wait to see shrek 3 man... i think donkey is so cute.. hahah says the stupidest things at the wrong times.. hahah that's what makes him a donkey... by the way, have u seen baby papa shrek? haha cute hor in diapers. heh heh... man, chris!!! fri ar, SHREK 3 YAY!!!! HAHAHA sorrie ppl, i think i'm on adrenaline rush.

oh and i must introduce to u my favourite show!! SPONGE BOB SQUAREPANTS!!! haahahah...

so cute hor!! hahha my gosh, i also want to live in a pineapple.. haahahah so cute... ok,

tat's all i got to blog for about today folks...

love u loads *muackz muackz* n take care...

3 more days to go...

I must testify of my Lord's goodness, He has provided me with a degree programme at NIE and i thank Him totally for taking care of me for the past 21 years and in years to come. Honestly, i would not be what i am today if not for Him, and so i am determined in believing that He has a plan installed for me to do works for Him. what is it, i'm nt so sure though i have my suspicions but whatever it is, in His time, i will myself to obey and to honour Him in every way that I can.

Why i thank Him? He has provided for me for my education, and to be so blessed to be able to further study... i am very thankful to Him. and so i would like to say a big THANK YOU JESUS!!!... what i am n have today is Yours.
bottom line is, always trust God... though it is nt easy but nv give up yeah?

gosh. it is nt easy when one is far far away from me.... *sighz* anyway, Chris left for a 5 day leader's advance in malacca... haha can u believe it, 3 more days... tmr would be 2 more days left before Chris returns. bet there'll be lots to catch up on and to learn from him. hee.. looking forward to his return on thurs. yeah!!! man... it feels weird not talking for 2 days... so not me... totally... heh. watever...

btw, went driving today, rained cats and dogs and i was busy trying to put a leash on the car. the roads were nt exactly free of cars when it comes to heavy rainy days. yuck yuck... i think nature is playing psychology too.... when u want it to rain, it shines so ever scorchingly, when u want it to shine, it rains cats n dogs... heh... maybe next time, i shall think of the opposite to obtain what i want.

yes!!! c'mon c'mon... according to my laptop it is now, 11.57pm... 3 more minutes to 12am... quick!! den it will be officially 2 more days... haahaa oh yeah and to drama auditions too.. so looking forward to it :)

love you loads readers!!!! *muackz muackz*

ps. dot if u are reading this, *reminder alert* thou has not tagged my bloggie for eons.... revive it pls. Angel u too!!!

PicTuReS....

Some pictures of nafa buddies when we met up at billy bombers at Cathay....

Time ticks...

It has been almost 2 weeks since i have left fajar but i feel that it was just yesterday that i had stepped out of Fajar. Gosh... i am missing them already. thank you fajarians for giving me pleasant memories of all of you and i definitely had a wonderful time just teaching you funky ppl. I miss all of you...

Will be reporting to Si ling secondary tmr.. mixed feelings. knowing the background of the sch, i wonder what He has in store for me. God help me!!! anyway, i'm counting on God to provide me with a cross over to the degree programme. really want to continue studying and expand my knowledge and be able to deliver new information to the younger generations.

Boring talks at Nie the past few days has made me wana study more man... haha amazingly, when one gives a talk on life skills, many ppl turn up. this shows that if the subject is relevant, many ppl will bother to avail themselves and turn up for it.

oh btw, i have an interesting website to share with you guys. ever heard of sodom and gomorrah in the BIBLE? anyway, archeologists have found its existance and as the BIble says, it is today in ruins, only seen as ashes with the brimstones aka balls of sulphur still here today on earth. I think it is 5000 degree celsius in each of the balls of sulphur. amazing huh. go read it...

type www.google.com den type in sodom and gomorrah satelite. a whole list of info will come out but i think it should be the first one on the list. u will see one with the same title as what u have typed in. go read it, they have other stuff too like noah's ark, the ark of the covenant. i think most of them have been found by archeologist. this proves one thing... Jesus is alive and very much real... !!! hurray!!!

love u all.... tata

Revived!!!

Good morning ppl. it is 7.12 am and i am blogging in the staffroom now. hahaha. it is the exams this week, so i have tons of invigilation to do which is ultra tiring. like machiam model like tat. u noe, the spaces between the desks den teachers have to walk up n down the hall. like runway for models. haahaha ok watever. anyway, my greatest apologies to u ppl who have been reading my stagnant blog. hahaha sorrie...
my my, 11 weeks have just come n gone like the wind. intially, i was quite scared of practicum but somehow time seems to past so fast when u're having fun, that u hardly feel that it has been already 11 weeks.
*sighz* went to watch spiderman 3 yesterday. hahaha. realized that there were quite a number of scenes that supports Christian values such as
forgiveness - not to bear hatred or grievances towards other people or else it would turn one into something 'ugly'.
Choices - we all have choices regardless of race or religion. It is the choice that we make that determines our path in life, basically our future which will in turn affect the people and environment around us.
Sacrifices - To lay down one's life for another loved one. FOr me, i see it as a way of how Jesus died on the cross for us. imagine, Harry, being Jesus, and Pete, representing us... i mean, he died in Pete's place which is to say, in order to save us,Jesus died for us on the cross taking away with him the things that we have done wrong aka sin. That is His Sacrificial love for us with no strings attached. amazing...
Many thanks to Chris, for giving me the little 'homework'on spidey 3.... heh heh... this is what i learnt.. muahahah...
In our present world, most people are living in a materialistic zone, where selfishness rules, it is the i, me, my concept. but is that what life is all about? if everyone spared a thought for another person, most prob the world would be a better place.

Anyway, back to my life in Fajar, i can't help but have a heavy heart knowing that i have to leave on Friday. The students, as mischievous as they are, i love them all. Thursday would be one memorable pizza party time that i will have with them. I must remember to take pictures then all of u can see my lovely playful students.

Some little updates..

ok so sorrie folks, i have been busy planning lessons for my students in Fajar... i hope they like the lesson. tried to make it fun and interesting. trying to teach them things about music that will be able to help them in future or to understand what ppl are talking about as they interact with ppl who understands music too.
Oh well, anyway, i am not sure if i can bear to leave them when i am supposed to. i love them so much even though sometimes, they do make me feel like i'm gonna kill them.. haha but i guess this is what makes it fun in secondary school. Teaching secondary students makes me think back about my days when i was in secondary school. one word to describe: WACKY!!!
Honestly, i think i'm going to admit it, i am a music person through and through... music has such an effect on me that i can't describe how i feel whenever i listen to any kind of music. spare me heavy metal k? can't even understand a word of screamo they are saying unless i back musk the track which i dun intend to for fear i hear things that i do not want to hear.

Went to watch phantom of the opera yesterday at esplanade with dai feng and met a few others. oh met xing yu and kai li too.. haha. the musical was good. no sorrie, it was a powerhouse musical. i am so glad that i managed to catch it this time round. the music and the orchestra was so good that it send goosebumps and chills down my spine. It is definitely worth watching. the tone of the voice together with the orchestra was perfect was so round. it was woohoo!!!! no words can describe it. i would recommend u watch it live.
I'll share with you some of my thoughts... when i watched it, i was thinking. " Oh my gosh, wat i am doing in a teaching line? i could have pursued a life of performing. " to make music together with orchestra, to compose songs and pieces, to find musicians to play my piece for me, the company of making music together. the arty farty life that i once had and so adored is still there but not as funky in a place called Bugis where we have secret garden, esplanade cafe right at our finger tips.
Thank God i still have my band to jam with. if not, i will really regret not pursuing a performing life.

Brahms!!! you rock my world!!!

ok i admit i am a sucker for minor keys. listening to Brahms's piano concerto no. 1 in Bb major and piano concerto in d minor brings back many fond memories in nafa. I am so tempted to attempt playing the d minor one. One of my favourites.
For those who have not heard it and are curious to know what it sounds like, pls find me. I'm more than willing to share with u...

*sighz* the melodies are so beautiful with rich harmonies, beautiful registras, wonderful orchestration... etc.etc. NAFA!!! I MISS U TOTALLY!!!

a world of music vs. a world of academic stuff... a life of performance with many chances to perform. i doubt that will ever be restored to me. unless i pursue a life of performance after my bond... but yet it holds a certain risk and a world full of unstability. Singapore arts scene isn't actually as happening as it is being rumoured to be. selective hearing or observation i rather call it. oh well... honestly, nafarians, u may be bitch about the amount of workload u have there, or the stress that u're facing. but trust me, once u're out of the system of nafa, or rather the music world in nafa u'll prob miss it. i do miss the company of nafa so much.

anyway, anyone who is interested in playing wif me brahms piano concerto in d minor, pls contact me.

Chinese New Year

These are some pictures i took of my family n i during Cny. hahaha. enjoyed myself quite abit during this festive season. haha. the nice break before teaching secondary students in 4 days time.

yay

my blog is driving me up the wall. for three days, it has hanged for no apparent reason. nth to do with my connection, serve bla bla bla... oh well, anyway, i am glad that CST oral exam is finally over. was glad that God was with me all the way throughout the exam. haha.. had lunch with eugene at jurong today. was good to catch up with him after 3 donkey years. but it was fun all the same. CNY is coming!!! guess i'll be doing the usual stuff.. haha
Nat: " Auntie, gong xi fa cai"
my aunt: " aiyo, guai guai, ni jin nian zai zuo se me ar?'
nat: " zai du shu lor"
aunt: " aiyo, na me jiu le, hai zai du shu ar, wei se me bu yao qu zuo gong?"
haha every year same questions and the same answers. somehow, old aunties dun get tired of asking the same question every year. or is it just that they do not bother to remember... either which, it is becoming a routine.. hahaha. but ok lar, i love them lots still. ok... got to go back and watch my korean show now. tata.

doughnut day :)

i had a fun day today. hee. was so touched when xing xing n kaili opened their rooms to sell their barangs barangs n invited me to sell my doughnuts. i was so happy... but my dot dot was late. hee, fortunately, i had chris with me. i think it was so sweet of him to accompany me to sell the doughnuts too. am glad he had fun too :) yupyup. anyway, the chocolate ones, lemon glazed doughnuts,durian doughnuts and plain ones are now available. hee.. i thank all of those who have supported in buying my doughnuts i appreciate it and may u continue to support us. thank you so much.
valentine's day is coming. hahah no one to spend it with except for my student. i have a date with him. ha ha. *piano lesson*... yup, i think valentine's day should not be just on 14 feb, i think it is ridiculous to just show ur affections on only one day. i think it should be an everyday affair. valentine's day should be everyday. not just on one particularly commercialized day. it does not make sense. i am so glad that every day is valentine's day for me with God n my family n frens :) truly blessed. hee.... a few more days to cNY n then Fajar here i come.. hahaha. God help me when i'm in there. hee.. looking forward to it yet nervous.

new day

interesting day i had today. dun noe why i woke up feeling so grumpy in the first place and den spent or rather tired myself out by baking lots of cookies. i enjoy it though. It just feels so serene... but nothing beats playing the piano and jamming with my bros lar. That's for sure. haha. went to nie concert yesterday. ok lar, i had fun but it brought back nostalgic feelings in me about my life in nafa. that is something i find it hard to get over up till today. i have no idea if i have difficulty letting it go or i do not want to let go. either way, i miss my life in town. *sigh*... am thinking of joining nie band where i can continue to play the piano and hopefully learn the harp but the thing is i have to be bonded to the band for 5 years. not too bad wat since my whole entire life is in the teaching businness. haha.
I have no regrets with my life i spent in nafa. and i certainly am looking forward to teaching to a certain extent. but i noe God is always with me but sometimes do u get the feeling that he is so far away. yeah and that's what i am feeling now. far far away though i noe he's near me. or perhaps, this is the after effects of tough love? i dun noe. but i pray daddy God that u give me the strength to continue all the rest of my days.

couldn't sleep so decided to share with you another wacky tom and jerry

new bloggie!!!

yay yay... i have a new blogskin. all thanks to my beloved dot dot. she took such pains to sit down and reedit the script. i was so touched but it was fun though sitting there and watch her do it for me. I learned smth new today... hahaha. was quite down today and am still troubled over certain things that relates to my future. but i noe that everything will turn out fine coz i am God's child, and no father will ever let his children come to harm or ruins. Every father wants the best for his child and i noe that God will watch and protect me. All i need to be is obedient but whether i have that amount of faith, i will tell u about it 5 years down the road when i look back upon this day. the comfort that i have for now is this song which has been quite ministering to me for the past 3 weeks. it is called till i see you again:

The greatest love that anyone could ever know
that overcame the cross and grave to find my soul
and if I see you face to face
and grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in You.

this is just the verse. even so, these few lines are warm enough to make me tear. it is so heartwarming to know that anyone could love me so much that he went through so much just to find me. therefore, i am still gng to pray about it. i will not give up without a good fight. heh heh. i won't admit defeat so easily knowing that God has a hand in it. God landed me here n i trust he wil provide smth good for me.

exzercise!!!

i had a rather brain draining week this entire week coz we had online discussions with a brainy teacher of ours who never cease to pump us with questions one after another. not that it is bad but it is good lar actually. It challenges how we view things related to music and to make us think deeply. which is actually not my cup of tea. i'm a practical music or so to speak. anyway, just to show what i have been doing for the past two weeks. i have been busy youtubing for nice shows. here are some of faves...

The Cat concerto which i must say, reminds me of uncle zecky as tom walks in to the piano n when he plays the piano, it reminds me of yikai.. muahaahahah.. watch it...

and i have purple smurfs....

videomania

it has been one fun and exciting week with my lecturers getting funkier by the lesson. hahah... n i needed time to myself. so while i was having sleeping nights, i spent time youtubing. found cool shows like carebears, smurfs. hahaha. here watch it. anyway the tom n jerry cartoon ar, when jerry walks in on stage, reminds me of uncle zecky n when he plays, he has this idiotic face that reminds me of yikai.. hahaha. oops a bit bad lar but it's a compliment to be featured in a cartoon. :)

doctor...

gosh, it is only the second week of sch and i have already taken ill. seen the doctor twice this week already. haha. doc is my best fren. muahahah. Anyway, i want to introduce u guys to this website. http://beatitudescloset.blogspot.com . it is a website of fashion. yeah, give it a try, if any of u like the designs there and want to buy it, u can either contact me or shirley. her number is stated there already. The clothes u see there are imported from korea n hongkong, quite neat and the price is rather reasonable. yup yup. so feel free to go take a look ya? haha
been busy making doughnuts for the past few days. it has been fun. the brownie doughnut has been quite a success. haaha. shall be thinking of a new name for it soon. and the cheese doughnuts are not bad too. mummy loves them. hahaha she says she might be having a doughnut waist soon. muahahah. aiya, anyway my daddy loves her all the same with or without the doughnut waist.
if u guys want more doughnuts, just tell me k? dun feel paisei or think that u are troubling. hahah coz i love making them. the joy is when the dougnuts take their shape. it is so cool. hahhaa. the thrill of making them smooth looking on the top... hahhaa.
i think God has been so good of taking care of my family for the past 20 over years. yeah. i just love him more n more each day. hahhaa. love u daddy God.

A New Year :)

ok a happy belated New Year to all of you. have learnt alot for the past few weeks as i reflect upon last yr. u noe, i realized that in a contrite world, there is room for lots of strive and contempt. however, as believers in this world, we have Jesus to count and to look for. haaha yeah, anyway my new year resolution is to be an influence and not being influenced by others and the environment.

snow or rain?

past 3 days has been raining continuously. i am beginning to wonder is it realli rain or melted snow? u noe due to our geographical location in the world, we have to be near the equator so much so that we can't enjoy beautiful white snow... gosh... the next best thing that we can enjoy during Christmas is rain. yup... and today it is so sunny but unfortunately, i have to be in church otherwise it would have a nice day to spend time with mummy by going shopping.. heh heh...
Can u believe it, Christmas is just 5 days away... SO EXCITING!!! hahaha... gng to church on christmas day to have lunch... den hopefully can go shopping. Dear God, pls dun let it rain. pls let there be sunshine. thank you so much. :)

Yup, anyway, let me share with you one of my favourites from Whose line is it anyway.. it is hilarious lar... i'll upload 'lorraine' to u guys soon... :)

Dreams of today... Memories of yesterday...

sometimes i feel that the dreams and visions i have for today and tomorrow will vanish into thin air and become a memory... i dun see effort, i dun see the perseverance, i dun see the commitment that i used to see in... why? i noe this road has not been easy but we worked so hard to achieve where we are today. and u take it for granted. i cannot believe how complacent u have become. i wish us to go further but sometimes,i feel with the current state of attitude, we are moving towards a dead end... i'll wash my hands of everything...

please remember one thing, there can't be results without conscious effort... if u think that by sitting there, do nothing, everything will remain the same. so be it. but i tell u, ur skills and whatever u have learnt, ur creativity will deterioriate at this rate.

It indeed saddens me but life still goes on. I'll just move on without u. when u are ready n think u want to continue, then u talk to me. if not, pls think thru...

bake-king day!!

tee-hee.. was supposed to go for choir today, but could not make it coz i kind of lost my voice.... it is pretty hoarse... oh well, but i spent time with daddy today in the kitchen, man we cooked up a storm.. there was cheesecake, fruit cake, and cream puffs... hee... quite a fun time, after that we kind of jammed with zk n chris... was interesting though, but i lack my wonderful bro.. gosh, i miss him so much. hee... yup yup...

i kind of miss playing in GCM aka tabernacle of David... with barney, jonathan, and the 3 of us just creating music, trial and error everywhere. hahaha. quite fun ar those days... gosh, i miss all of them... *sigh* time and life goes on... u have better things in store for me. right daddy God?

Christmas is round the corner... with lots of party to attend... heh. have one tmr, have one this sun, so exciting... den the next whole week.. is PARTY TIME!!! but.. i'm a bit lazy to go... if those of u whose party i'm supposed to attend, are reading this, rest assured, u'll see me there but just lazy lar...

Thursday...

ok... today is a thursday.. a fun one in fact.. had a fun time polishing my nails... it is ultra shiny n smooth coz i used mummy's nail buffers, conditioners... watever u use to make the nails beautiful after that i appiled the varnish... ultra shiny lar. so beautiful. was staring at my nails at orchard the entire time.... hah hah...

yeah was at orchard watching eragon at lido... it is actually a very nice show about dragons, dragon riders, magic... u noe the fairytale kind of stuff. and the dragon is so cute when it was young but yet loveable when it is older... but somehow, i get the feeling that it is almost similar to the lord of the rings... yeap... after that, went to coos for some mic course.. interesting info which serves as a reminder and a refresher course... oh well, thank God for the talents that he has placed in the church. just ensure that one does not become complacent after serving God for too long. must always check the heart...

have been feeling down the past few days. but owells, i always have my parents with me and dot, angel and ern who always stand by and correct me... hehe.. u noe sometimes, though i noe that God loves me so... but yet i always have this lonely feeling sometimes, that he is not there... he is so far away from me but yet i noe he is just a phone call away... i dunno how to explain to u these feelings... it is tough for me to describe... have been having sleepless nites for the past few days. must be coz i dun have enuff work to do. so i am running on unused energy... it is like wake up, i have stored energy and when i dun use up the entire tank of energy, i can't sleep at nite. yupz.

another thing... i can't feel the christmas spirit anymore... when i was young, i love christmas.. one can feel the mood n spirit of christmas. but rite now, it is so comercialized.. it sucks... where is the spirit? and christmas is just 2 weeks away... haiz... maybe it is just me... can someone tell me pls? if it is not just me, God can pls grant me this request, pls instill the spirit of christmas again once more :)... i need it.... heez...

shoppaholic...

went shopping with mummy yest... went to chill out at raffles city, marina square coz mummy wanted to see the cute purple balls hanging from the ceiling and suntec city... yeah invited belinda along... we had a fun time yest and mummy n i went to view swimsuits.. i tell u, i have never in my life fell in love with swimsuits until now... gosh, i saw a pretty lime green with brown patternspaghetti strap shirt swimwear with straps which can turn it into a cross-back or a halter.. pretty cool and the bottom would be shorts... yeah man, i love the shop seafolly... if u peeps are interested, u can go to their website... www.seafolly.com amazing swimwear for girls exclusively... unfortunately, i did not get it coz there isn't my size.. have to wait for 2 more weeks for new arrivals. so must see the latest design.. heh heh...

oh yeah, i have always wondered why do most secondary school kids want to dress up as if they are in their 20s? gosh, honestly, in my opinion, they look horrendous... they think they're cool but they are far from it.... look ur age pls... it is so sala, u look at the face, u go wow, this girl is young, and u look at the dressing n u go: man she looks old... *gross*... ok anyway, new age mentality is not fathomable... hah hah...

had a nice day spending time with mummy n preparing the party stuff on sat... den chilled to some lounge n jazz music on daddy's new hi-fi system... was solid man i tell u... heh enjoyed it thoroughly... mum n dad, if u are reading this, i wana tell u tat i love u to bits... u're the best. thank you for giving such a wonderful life n home.... God loves u n i do too... :)

oh Lorraine!!!

hahaha... man, spent my entire day jammin with zg n zk yesterday and this morning watching lorraine... something which i heard shan yu and zk tell me. so decided to go see what is so nice about lorraine... she is this woman who does idiotic stuff ahahaha. can be quite irritating lar... yups... yupz. share with you some pictures of fun times we had during the camp... Thanks Kenny!!! i copped the pics from ur bloggie. heh heh...

Joline and I

Zhong kai's happy face... i think he is being delilah in the game
Zhong Guo's shorts sama sama with Kenny.... yikes

Justin n i slacking on comfy round cushions... we wanted to take it home. rite juz?
enjoying a slice of pizza with myself, aurylia, oli n pastor jenn :)
trying to take the round cushion away from justin...

n wat is marcus aka 'chillex' boy gleeing about?
awww... one big happy family serving God in music :)

'cHiLL-LeX' ...

ok peeps, in case if you are wondering where i have been for the past 3 days, i was in a music advance camp organized by my church... it is pretty cool... at least for me, having just joined the music min, i felt that thru this, i was able to relate to more people but i guess it does not stop here, this is just an ice-breaker for me.
I had fun man in camp. honestly, i was home-sick on the first day. weird ok, i never felt home sick before... owells, learnt a lot of new words from Marcus: chill- lex, n his hokkien, english n chinese version: wa jia Myojo er yi... Translation: i eat myojo only... den josh had this really cool matchstick trick that everyone was figuring out... hahha... yeah rite now, am feeling tired coz we slept realli early in camp like 2am? yea pretty early...

we had worship sessions too apart from laughters... it is realli cool.. I guess these sessions serve as a process... I learnt a lot spiritually n it is also like a reminder... ok i shall be gracious and be miss nice to share with you some...

ok basically, being in a worship ministry is happening and cool but that is not the main purpose. wat God wants to see is our heart. it does not matter if we have talent or not but it is the heart that weighs... and being in a ministry, any ministry requires us to be true and open to God as well as ourselves and the ppl around us.. God does not want us to put on a mask when we come to church only to have that mask taken off from mons- fri... God loves the person behind the mask not the one with the mask. He loves us for who we are. It is ok if you think that u are not that great n not worthy coz u have a lot of problems or issues... Hey, it is fine, no one is perfect. If you have a prob, God is there for u to help u n comfort you... he does not condemn, he wants to help u, to be ur fren, to be there for u when u need help... If u are reading this, n u are in need of help, why not give it a try to ask God for help? He will respond coz he loves u. :)

narcissist

been enjoying myself during hols. it is definitely a much deserved break from all the essays that i have been doing. heh heh... been going out with fren, spending time with loved ones, taking a lot of pictures of myself... haha... let me show u some...

yup tat's all the pictures i have taken so far.. haha... oh ya, and i can't believe that the GST is going to be 7% soon. man tat's fast.... a few more mnths and i am going to pay more than usual... gosh. pathetic. oh well, God can i have more money please? hee.... love you all... :) *hugs and kisses*

puff puff puff

guess wat have i been doing for the past few days? haha yup busy baking cream puffs and taking pictures of myself. yeah, call me a narcissist. haha. ok so here comes the pics of my daddy's cream puffs. it is pretty. i couldn't bear to eat them. haiz...


those are daddy's yummy cream puffs.. hee freshly baked from the oven... yum. Aren't the shapes pretty... heh heh...

bewildered...

*gosh* 1 week has passed so quickly. have been busy practicing for competition... it is fun. this is wat i call life... haha anyway, it is fun yet stressful yet enjoyable... haha.. i am a little sad coz i can't start daddy's cake shop online coz i heard that i need to obtain a license and i have absolutely no clue as to go about applying for one. *sigh*.. i need help man... if you guys noe how to obtain the license, please feel free to call me and guide me ok. it's pretty important to me. thank you so muchie...
oh yea, tmr daddy's going to bake cream puffs with chocolate custard and mango custard. yum yum... yay n i am gng to help do the shell of the puffs... it's gonna be pretty...

just came back from church, had a wonderful day... oh, i was reading this book that dear ruth lent me. it is gems.. if i am not wrong... if i can remember correctly, i was awoken by this sentence," nowadays people take God for granted"... if you think about it, it is rather true... and it also challenges the way we view worship. Worship is nothing without the Holy Spirit... it would be just a performance, an empty vessel. Worship is an act of humility, to stand in awe of our God, to be grateful for his dying on the cross, for saving us from death... and so, because of this few statements that hit me, i reflected upon it and today, it is like a total different meaning when i went for service... Sometimes, due to our busy stuff everyday and a peaceful life here, it is indeed a blessing but it is also easy to forget God. but i thank God for ruth nonetheless, for letting me read that precious book that made me remember why God created me. that is to worship him and enjoy his goodness. :) yup...
i guess i will end here for now. gng to plan some party thingee for christmas... haha... love you all.... and may God bless you richly. *muackz*

LoOk HeRe!!!

yay... gosh i enjoyed may's wedding on sat. it was realli nice. haha. *sigh* heh heh... oh anyway, just to update all of you... i'm gng to start a little foodie stall online.. yup so check my blog for more updates ok? all the yummylicious food that my daddy is going to bake. There'll be cream puffs, cheesecakes in chocolate, mango, strawberry n coffee flavours... pics will be up soon tho. the name of the 'cafe' will be up soon. will keep you guys posted... :) hope you guys will like the pastries.

hooray!!! it's a happy holiday

yay!!! the last of my psycho essay is over. YAY!!! FREEDOM!!!! hahaa. but it comes with a price. i ain't feeling well. sob sob. oh well, this 1 n a half mnths is a long deserved break for me. i worked very hard for the past 3 months ok... anyway, brought mrs. gnojeck out yesterday with dot dot. it was super fun lar... hahaha. had a lot of things to see. oh well, i guess singapore is an asian america.. coz, everything that mrs gnojeck sees, is more or less the same as back in her country.. hahaha.... which means we are boring... got any new things anot ar... haiz... haha anyway, will be busy practicing the next few weeks.. so ya.. dun disturb.. muahahaha jk jk.. i am super happy lar... hahaha

His PreSeNcE!!!

totally enjoyed my time in church today.. yeah. today i felt that the spirit was different. somehow, God was dwelling in the midst of us doing his work in each and every one of us. To love us and let us be loved... May God continue to work in the two bands everyday. :)
rite... one last psycho paper, and i'm off to nafa for good. muahahaha sounds as if i am going to teach at nafa. but nah, going to join uncle zecky in his choir... so cool lar. man i miss those days at nafa, that was the life... the high-life... creating music is the highest form of life anyone can attain man... haha. i mean not forgetting God who is first in everything but i thank God for music, can u imagine ur life without music. it is like not being able to breathe in any air. gosh.. music is wonderful but of course it is powerful too. so be careful wat u use ur music for :)
yay... i have a happy feeling about this week coz it is making-music week. preparing for competition for da-ge aka desmond, and recently ruth too :) hee. man back to the old days. wat a nostalgic feeling. and with dot dot too... man i think nafa is gng to be noisy for the next 1 mnth or so. u can see dot dot n i playing catching, crashing courses, laughing very loudly, doing dumb stuff....
oh yeah, currently it is sun morn... i am feeling excited coz this will be my first time playing in coos worship. yeah!!! God, await my worship to you with the band at 5pm!!! LOVE YOU JESUS!!! U ROCK!!!

tat's weird!!

ok, i posted my testimonies of how God has done for me the last time. But for some strange reason, it has deleted by itself. anyway, i am gng to write it again. I want to share with you how God has literally saved my life.

I want to thank God for preserving my life to where i am today. u see, i was born with a hole in the heart and doctors predicted that i had only 3 weeks to live. Thanks to my mum's steadfastness, she kept on praying and miraculously, the hole closed by itself. This miracle was not only to testify that God is real but it was also the start to my father's salvation.

The second time that God saved me was when i had to go for 2.4km run during PE lessons. i came to this junction that we had to cross. I guarantee u i looked left to right then right to left to make sure that there was no cars ok. but suddenly, a white merz came out of nowhere in my direction. I was stunned and i could not move an inch. The car came closer until it was a few inches away from me and all of a sudden i felt this strong but gentle force that pushed me backwards onto the gravel road. Initially, i thought that it was one of my frens who pulled me back. but when i looked around, there was no one on the road with me. I knew then that it was God who saved me. I was not hurt or anything. No bruises or whatsoever. Perfectly fine!! :)

Through these two testimonies, i know that God is real and is always on the look out for us, protecting us. Some of you may think that it is sheer luck. but up till today, luck has not done anything for me but my God has. I hope that you will be encouraged by these testimonies. May God richly bless u :)

Teachers as role models??!!??! i dun think so

ok, many of u may noe that teachers are indeed role models and not all teachers are mean. but i tell you, i am so mad with this teacher of mine. oh btw, i cleared her class today as we took her english test. i can't believe it ok, for english, i did a question wrongly. and so i asked my teacher how? she said," fail lor".. URPS LAR!!! be more encouraging and comforting as a teacher can? oh and she is ultra ultra ultra super duper rude... last week, we made quite a bit of noise as she ate into our other class's time. she got super worked up that she turned around and said," do me favour, zip your mouth!!!".... ?!?!?!?!?!?! like so ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? man if that is how a phd holder in english is going to behave and react to cute loveable students like us, it has definitely set an ugly image about english... gross...
Get this straight, a phd does not mean anything.. it is just a cert... to help u get a job, but it ain't gonna sustain u a job if u lack creativity and manners... if u tink phd means the world, yeah it does, it means Permanant Head Damage... and one will think it is the world coz of pride... so must be careful ya ppl when u get ur upper degrees and doctorates and stuff. back to reality...
*sigh* my english, Dear God pls work a miracle and help me pass this subject. I do not want to retake this english module again. it is torturous... i rather play music with english than to write letters with english.
Happy thoughts now: rite, i am going to join in all or rather most activities held by NAFA like CHOIR!!!!! GAMELAN!!!!! uahahahahahah... yea yea yea... miss the life there man. it is like the bomb. so glad nie is OVER!!! OVER!!! HURRAY!!!! one last psychology essay to go and wala. kabaam... ovua... ciao... tata.... and hello... bonjour... sawadicrap... holidays and NAFA... THANK YOU JESUS!!! *MUACKS MUACKS* tat you help the time in nie to pass by so quickly. Continue to do so pls if there is an overload of assignments and help us get to happy thoughts and activities faster. :) LOVE YA JESUS!!!

Bathroom singer??

i used to wonder why are there so many people who love to sing in the bathroom. Well, i found that out myself. u see, the way the bathroom is structured actually gives one a room filled with cool acoustic settings. there are lots of uneven walls, coz u got bottles everywhere so the sound is really nice u noe. the acoustics are power-packed.

i was super hyper after jamming with zg,which was like after 11pm, that i started singing "To You, we lift up our hands..." and i was pretty hooked to singing in the bathroom coz the reverb was like so nice. i can't stop singing. Well, though i noe that i didn't go out of tune, one uncle went," oei oei oei, u noe what time already anot, still sing". i was like oops.. haha yikes. i think it is super fun lar... hahaha. I had my revenge on that uncle the next day. we jammed like mad haahaa. so poor uncle.

ok. been busy pretty lately, caught with lots of projects... haha. have tons of work assignments to fulfill. like what is new rite.. haha yup. so just hanging in there, counting on God to provide me with all the strength i need to sustain and still counting Him.... Go Daddy Go!!! GO !!!! GO!!!

ok... back to projsss now.....

I'm back...

i am so so sorrie tat i didn't update my blog. kind of lazy yet busy.. sometimes, i wish there is an auto thingee where u can just think in ur mind what u want to say and den it will automatically upload itself into the com. ok anyway, a little update. NIE does not seem that bad anymore now that i have finished 3 modules.. cool... yup, I thank daddy God for allowing me, my two bros to serve in Coos band with our talents. heez, what a joy. With mixed feelings, i have to resign to the fact that my bro n i are serving in 2 different bands. Not that it is bad or anything, but we are so used to playing with each other that sometimes, we need not say a word n we noe where we are heading just by the music and flow. *sigh*. Oh well, it's good to have exposure and to be able to work with others tho. New stream of ideas heh heh...

Anyway, i just came back from jamming with Tehillah, *gosh i hope i spelt it correctly*, yup. not too bad, my first time jamming with them so just go with the flow man.. hahaha. looking forward to the next jamming. Basically, i think they are a bunch of easy going people.. haha.. but in that small room, n sitting next to the drummer, gosh it is like sitting next to zg man. ultra loud. hahaha. next time i must rem to bring ear plugs. kekeke

Dear God, what do u think will happen in the next few years or in lightyears to come? i was thinking, do u think that there will be a need for musicians now that technology is moving and improving so fast? i mean, like i can stack 3 or 4 keyboards and have a control knob or effects box for myself or maybe there won't even be a need for me to play.. just asking i noe my imagination abit wild, but nvm.

YAY~!!!! sch's hols are coming soon. yes yes yes!!! i miss my nafa carefree days man. no matter how ar, i tell u, nafa days are the ultimate bomb. NIE can't beat it. HEAR THAT NIE!!! NAFA REIGNS SUPREME!!!! ok lar. nie is fun in its own way when there is no major essayssssssss to do. *note the many sssss behind the essay*

ok lar, got to do project now. tata.

Trust..

gosh... i am missing europe right now.. the cool weather, the carefree attitude. haha. i was quite pleased knowing and being reminded that my life is in God's hands no matter what happens. Yeah even though, life seems tough but u never know, it may be a blessing in disguise, God could have had something to teach us through that tough journey. Well, for me, i would say. these tough times, would be the workload in nie... yeah, though i noe i have been complaining alot lately, but looking back, i learn to lean on God for support and wisdom to guide me through my essays.
Honestly, i can say with confidence that God has been good to me. Evidence: ok i am the kind of person who tries to get as much work done as possible so that i can relax and spend time with family and friends. I dun care how stressed i am or how it has an effect on me. all i want, is to be done and rid of it.
However, God has taken care of me in such a way that if i have an essay to hand in, say upcoming tues, i am able to complete my essay within 2 days but, if i were to do the other modules, I will not be able to concentrate. i will start to day-dream and God will send tons of ppl in my path to distract me, allowing me to rest before starting on the next essay.
As i look back, God has been gracious to me, teaching me to be still in His presence, to find comfort in him. Through this, i learnt once again to commit and surrender everything that i have n am unto Him again.
so once again, i give all glory to God 4eva
YEAH!!!

comical dad

yay.. Thank God daddy's operation was a success. haha. thank you for all the brothers and sisters that have prayed for my daddy. I appreciate it lots. thank you so much...

daddy has 3 weeks mc, and he is getting stronger and lamer everyday. haha. he is very comical as he will crack a joke, make everybody laugh, and then he will say" dun laugh my stomach very pain"... coz he can't laugh as his stitches are around his tummy area. hahaha. mummy is so hardworking too. seldom u see her cook twice for a meal. bcoz of daddy, she does so. so sweet hor. and the food tastes nicer for daddy too despite having no salt in it. hee.

now having hols, but tons of essay to finish. so yup, trying to finish up as much as possible. then can go shopping. hahaha.. tata

MY BIRTHDAY!!!!

i am very happy today. u noe why? because i am so blessed to have been born into such a wonderful family with amazing parents, great bros and beautiful friends. i had a nice surprise today. a bouquet of flowers was sent to my hse. it was so beautiful. i love it man... heez, oh ya, then we had an early birthday dinner with some of them at vilage at heerens. den shannon who is 4eva on his way came late with yifang n leo.. hahaha. but it was extremely memorable.

To me, though this is the first simplest birthday that i ever had compared to the lavish and fun ones at nafa, ironically it was quite enjoyable. even the nafa arts ppl like carol and xingyu gave me bdae presents. that was one pleasant surprise. i appreciated it. realli. thank u babes.. :)

today i was just thinking does pretty gals/handsome guys mean they have pretty hearts? u noe ,today in the bus, i saw this guy with his gf, den when we were at the interchange, he just stood up walked to the front and alighted leaving his gf looking so stoned. i mean, aren't guys supposed to protect their gfs. hmmm, i have no idea. guys nowadays are weird creatures.

i used to wonder how come all the pretty gals are attached but the normal ones are left behind... i came to a conclusion that not all pretty gals are nice. only some but those relationships may or may not be a lasting one. however, those gals who are average looking, they have a very nice character and a good heart. but it takes time for ppl to noe them. i think that shld be the way. do u agree?
hee. today at 12am, which marks 23rd sept will be the first day that i will be starting life at twenteen yrs old... cool huh... heh heh.

jigsaw puzzle.....

Gif me oil in my lamp, keep me burning burning burning. Give me oil in my lamp i pray
Gif me oil in my lamp, keep me burning burning burning. Keep me burning till the end of day.
wat a nice song in times like these... it applies both to my relationship with God and me being in the physical realm. sometimes, i wonder what is life... what are friendships about? is it that valuable? wat makes it valuable... sometimes, i feel tat i am like a spare tyre... oh well, i guess tat's life. someone has to be made used of at some point of time. someone who is easily forgotten....
Anyway, today it was kind of angel n sebas to give me a lift to jp interchange even though it was not realli convenient for him. He could have easily said no coz it wasn't on the way. *touched* thank u guys... i appreciate it.
had some time alone today, to spend time with myself n God, to think things thru... to relax away from everybody.

haiz... reminiscence

this morning, boy was i glad that i handed in classroom management essay and YES!! it is indeed the last lesson alread.. woohoo!! haha. anyway, when i was walking to my classroom, i heard small daniel prac the clarinet, man, i tot it was nafa for a split second but realized in an instant that i am in an Institute of Essays. so boring. who likes to write wat 20 essays?!?!? no joke ok..
today went to find my cousin who is working at ntu. she just started work there, she made me walk all the way to canteen B and i had to ask 2 ppl to get there. *sheesh* why can't she just ask ppl to help her get to nie. *sigh* must be the age gap. must be daring ma. haha. was looking forward to coming home to my family. it is like, i'm totally lethargic outside, but home is like a recharger for my body which is like a battery to continue for the next day's essays assignment. totally *boring* as angel's latest word.. uber boring. haha... btw, today leo came to nie, to find some books but i think he so blur. haha we couldn't find each other and i was quite worried as i left my belongings in the room. was pretty afraid that my stuff would go missing when i get back.... haha. those are my precious stuff. farni how, life seems to revolve around technology. one feels so handicapped without them. can u imagine a day without a hp... hmm...
haha.. i love my bros more n more everyday. esp zg... haha sorri zk, can't help it. who call u always bully me.. muahahahah. no lar, jk. ok... back to essays. i have more interesting news but i have to confirm it first before i can let u guys noe. tata

beefed up?

did i fail to mention that i love my parents very much, followed by my bros and then frens.. heez. i think all of these are the best things in my life next to God. anyway, thank you guys for keeping my family in prayer. thank you. i truly appreciate it.
Anyway, today mummy cooked mee tah bak n daddy cooked for my beef coz he said i must eat more meat. why? coz i got low blood pressure.. so daddy cook for zhong guo n i. heez. so nice of my daddy. i love him so so so so much. *muacks to daddy* Mummy i love u too. haaah.
thank God, i managed to finish up classroom management essay. u noe, sometimes nie is so deafening. not in noise but in silence. it is a deafening silence in nie. it is so musicless. i miss the out-of-tune tuning notes of instruments, screams, loud laughter. noise seems to be music at nafa where creativity flows freely. in nie it is so constipated. it just dries up all creative juices thanks to essays. oh well. so boring...
to my buddies: gangly, wobbly, squiggly, shu shu, van. may God bless u guys in every aspect in your life: studies, emotions, relationships and mentally. may He continue to give u strength and wisdom and may his angels guard over u. We'll pull through :) Love u guys

Dinosaur age...

oh boy, it has been a long time since i blogged. haha. kind of miss it. just finished one the management essays.. just needs a little touch-up. anyway, i hope i did it correctly and Bopry would like it. heez.
Anyway, I would like to apologize to all my darling frenz whom i have lashed out at unintentionally... esp angel n dot.. heez... sumtimes, i guess my tone isn't very nice and all. but i dun realli realize it. for ppl out there. i dread ppl disturbing me halfway when i am reading a book, thinking about work or doing work. other than that, disturb me all u want. if u do, u will get a lashing from me which is unintentional at times. haha.. *oops* must control. heez. yup sorrie... love u guys and thanks for telling me :)
One hectic week but hey, SEPT is here. heh heh. oh man, i have a love-hate relationship with this month- september. zk, if u are reading tis, dun even say a word. i noe what u are thinking and wat u are gng to say. shhh... i dun wish to read or hear it. let me live in self-denial thank u.
ok.. now, i am gng to do project work with gangly. that poor girl, i hope n pray she gets well soon. love u gangly *muackz* tat includes wobbly, squiggly and me flabbly (new name given by dot dot) no choice ar... hahaha

Good morning Jesus

Good morning Daddy God...
i noe it is early in the morning and shld be in bed now but I can't slp... too many things running through my mind. things i have done, things i have said, things that i intend to do and am doing. Am i doing the right things? Wat I did, is it right? I dunno. only u noe the ans... I made many promises to u... some i kept, some i did not. Sometimes, i do not have the boldness to stand up for what is right, but i always end up giving in until it becomes too big a prob... but I thank you for giving me the strength this very morning to stand up for what is right, to acknowledge what i did was wrong and to correct it.
Lord, I pray that u will continue to strengthen me and to give me the strength, not to dwell on the past but to learn and never commit the same mistakes again. Relationships and friendships are all in your hands... Look forward to a better relationship I will... to draw near in your dwelling place if u will accept me back again... to be safe in your arms away from danger... to soar on eagle's wings with you... for u to love me again... Dear Lord, ur love and ur acceptance is what i long for... i pray for those brothers and sisters that i have stumbled in the process. may u build them up spiritually again and send a revival among us. May our love for u be renewed again and to restore us to our first love which is u. Father, i pray for those who are sick, may u heal them and restore good health to them. By faith, they are healed and active again. May u richly bless each n everyone who reads this, that they may find their strength and comfort in you too :) For when we are weak, you are strong. When we are poor, u are rich.
Thank you Jesus..
Amen.

JaMmInG....

yest was the first sunday that i did not go church at all. haha why? because i attended the youth service on a sat. so basically my sun is free. haha. this morning, went out zhong guo n zhong kai aka mr. 22 hahaha. (can't help it lar bro. haaha) to jam with tim at orchard... it was quite fun to jam together in a studio. it was quite an experience for me... i have never been into a jamming studio. so yup, it was an experience.
Went jalan jalan at orchard area since we were already there with mummy n daddy n my two wonderful bros.. haiz i love God n my family so much...
wanted to do essay. apparently, we went out with a bunch of wacky ppl until 10 plus. so hahaha. my sunday was burnt as usual but i had fun which is rare nowadays.
TIme: 12:10am
Wanna thank God for guiding me thru the first paragraph of my essay. If not for him, I would be stoning at my laptop turning into the 'rock' mode. (the highest level of stoning)... was super happy and am still happy. THANK YOU JESUS...
Just a little smth abt me for some of u who think you noe me very well... my silence is and should not be taken as a weakness. If i say no in your face firmly, take it n leave me alone... if i give u an inch, dun u dare take a yard...

ps. thank you bros for taking care of me n distracting me away from my work. without u guys, i prob go mad and not have so much fun.. heez. esp zk. u wait ar... haha
Take care ppl...

precious gem..

when i was young, i used to play pirates finding a treasure chest with my playmates... it was fun. anyway, it is seldom that i am aware of a gem. anyway, today i just did. i was doing my QT this morning, and the bible verse was phil 4: 13
" I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me"

haha. yup, that was pretty much of a comfort after gng thru 4 weeks of torture in nie. with all that essays, project work, individual assignment and rushing of classes. haha. so to me, that is pretty much a gem as it helps me look on the positive side knowing that my God is for me and He will always be there for me guiding me in each and every step that i take.
TOnight i have cell group. woohoo!!! looking forward to it. i have 4 more weeks at the adult cell group and will be moving on to the youth one. gng to miss all the aunties, uncles, ah pek, hahah no lar... they are a very fun and lame bunch of ppl despite their age. see maturity doesn't come with age at all.

anyway, mummy just kicked me out of the kitchen as i helped her destroy her meatballs. as usual i am doing smth stupid. hahaha. can't help it lar, must take a break ma after doing and thinking how to phrase essays, choose the right word. no wonder the saying: teachers are the first to go mad... does that apply to student teachers too? hmmm...

i better get back to my mundane pastime now: ESSAYS!!!!! :'( haiz.. i miss nafa as usual. the fun, the laughters, the tears of joy, the groans of hungry stomachs, benny's and desmond's constant complains of "dun tu tu tu", yifang's diva attitude, ryan's corny jokes, daniel's loud voice, sebas's funny sounds in the throat that drives yifang mad... and of coz, Dr. Goh's loud character which makes us burst out in laughing fits.

oh well, REUNION DINNER NEXT SAT OR SUN.... I MUST MEET UP WITH U GUYS!!! I MISS ALL OF U LIKE CRAZY!!!! *MUACKS HUGS AND MORE KISSES*