looking back...

looking back...

sometimes i wish i have never returned... i do ask myself wat on earth am i doing... oh well, i guess it is just me being in a bad mood now. n of all things, my nokia phone has to give mi problems... what a bimbotic phone. cute but no substance... it is like a bimbo.. all beauty n no brains.. sheesh.. what a comparison.

and den i have my father who found out that i will be trimming my hair on sat, he has been happily egging at me to cut it real short. like hello... this is my hair, the silky black strand thingee that grows out of my head... it belongs to me... so i do wat i want with it... heh

His reason for telling me to cut short hair.. must follow the rules and regulations that nie has coz now i'm in degree.

like Puhleeze, rules are meant to be broken. if not why are there rules. they are just guidelines to groom u into a model nerd.

when i was still in nie doing my diploma, rule 3 states that: no slippers allowed on campus... u think i care? i also wore slippers. ALSO LIKE TAT. what is the big deal about my hair being long man? As long as i dun wear anything revealing or provocative, it's fine wat..

maybe one day i should just shave bald to shock him. give him more than he can ask for. u want to dare me, i'll take on ur dare n do double of it, till u realize that i do have a mind of my own.. *say only hehe... can't bear to shave off my nice nice hair*...

PS. for ur information, if u are wondering why my mum is nt saying anything during my little disagreement with my dad, she is just enjoying the whole drama scene between my dad n i. n she says:" aiya, just ignore him, no need to cut too short. just trim"... muahahha so farni... yay mummi rox!!

i tell u ar, fathers are never the best people to seek advice on fashion... but sometimes, my dad's sense of fashion is ok, but most of the time, ok ok lar... heh heh

anyway, too moody to blog le lar... but just to let u all noe, i still love u tata.. it is the mood swings...

but nvm, hearing and msning my baobei made my day just a few minutes ago... man, i love her to bits... she is so cute lor... haha. i shall post another picture of her n amanda, another lovable student from 2A1... got many favourite students, but unfortunately no pics. the only images and memories i have are engraved in my heart and mind.

but we did have fun times.. to me, i have more fun n good times than bad with them.. everyday is an enjoyable n fun day with lots of laughter... :)

trip to the dentist...

a trip to the dentist...

was scared to go to the dentist yest for i know that i was gng to kena scolding from my dentist... haha as usual... but to my surprise, he said my teeth were pretty clean. *phew*. maybe gng to the dentist was not that bad after all..

the best part of after a dental appointment is the luxurious time i spend with mummy walking round junction 8. heh heh... yup, and yest we went to this shop called bits n pieces. We saw this nice nice chunky silver bracelet but it costs $118!!! YIKES... but i fell in love with it... haiz. oh well, too bad that it costs so much, if not for the fact that silver tarnishes, i would have bought it already...

so in order to comfort myself, i decided to go lee hwa jewellery to see if there were any nice nice bracelets, apparently none, though i did see lots of nice nice diamond rings. hahah... they do have chunky bracelets, but apparently they were over chunky till they looked like guys' fashion. yuck. i totally regret walking in to lee hwa... just makes me want to go back to bits n pieces to buy that bracelet. sheesh. heh heh... so the best thing to do is to close ur eyes, n walk out of the shopping centre and to the MRT station. hahah

yup. so far ar, i think only lee hwa sells authentic diamonds, they come from the belgium diamond factory... unlike goldheart, they sell manmade diamonds.. pay so much for artificial goods. wat a waste.. hah... oh well...

n can u believe it?!?!? i think i have only 16 more days to wait.. hurray!!! next week i'm gng to start teaching at siling for 6 weeks. wonder how much damage i'm gng to bring to the students there... intend to drive them up the wall before they drive me crazy... yup... n oh i'm so happy. something wonderful has happened to dear mr, yang!! heh heh... i'm happy for u!! realli am :)

ok... am gng to take a nappy now...super tired from settling my table n stuff..

Totally disgusted...

Totally disgusted...

ok here's a topic for everyone to discuss n chip in ideas n thoughts k?

Scenerio: was eating at Hotel Intercontinental today... saw a couple with the girls' parents eating... once they have finished, they decided to make their payment... rite.. it is usually the guys who pay rite? ok fine... but then the girl just made a statement, i think i want to pay for this luncheon... so the guy was like oh ok... the girl was pissed man... hahaha i totally understand why... btw, the girl paid in the end.... hah, the guy's dead!!

when a girl says no, it sometimes means a yes. n when a girl says yes, sometimes she might just be obliging the guy... yes i noe it is confusing, but sometimes girls are just shy to voice their opinions.. so guys, u must noe when to step up n when to step down. dun be a dumb dumb n take a girl's word for everything....

esp to zg n zk n to guys who ever read this blog... if ever u have a gf, pls ar, if she

brings her parents along, PAY FOR THE PARENTS TOO!!! DUN BE SO MISER!!!... dun care if the girl or her parents say they'll pay... be gentlemen, dun assume u can save money k? for all u noe, they are testing ur generosity... mess it up, n lose the girl... dun come crying to me ar... i won't help u...

P.S. one day u will thank me for it...

i tell u.. when i saw that guy n the girl, i guarantee u, he is in for a war zone... dumb lei that guy, nv met a more dumb guy than him... no brains... I would definitely side with his gf...

hahah ok... if any comments, feel free to tag me abt it or leave a comment, if ever u can find a comment link on my page here... today i had a fun day... bought shoes for mummy, bought a nice elegant top for myself.. it is partial turqoise with a mixture of green with nice nice hearts all over it. love it lots...

ZG!! DUN KILL ME... u said cannot buy shoes, so i bought clothes instead. :) hee...

haha n didn't realli talk much to chris today coz that poor boy is so tired... i think he should rest more... and wat a surprise, i feel this week is moving quite fast now that i dread for next week to come... hahah what an irony... actually ok lar, mixed feelings... if time passes faster, chris comes back sooner but that means i'll be teaching in si ling already... haha oh well, might as well get over n done with it... FACE THE MUSIC N THE ENGLISH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...

ok gtg now... love u all loads *muackz muackz*

happy day...

happy day...

yay.. today was quite fun actually. firstly, i had driving lessons in the morning. that was cool drove for 2.5 hours. man, driving is so tiring but it so fun. heh heh... i think manual driving rox lar... u noe why? it feels like daytona. hhaha only the faster and real version.

in the afternoon, met with my baobei from Fajar sec, ivy, n her 2 other baobei students. we went to watch pirates of the caribbean.. hee tho it is my second time watching, i feel that the company makes it all worthwhile. i get to see my baobei, den meet up with good frens n meet ppl. why not... man, fajar brought me happy times. can't bear to leave u guys but i have to.. hee... love u all precious students *muackz*

shall show u how my baobei looks like k ? she is very cute n her name is shiqi... yup

i love her lots... to me she is the best student any teacher can have... haha... who ever said fajar students nt good ar... come, i'll show u my angels... ask me n i tell u hu are the cute n lovable ones.

dun u dare bully any of my students ar... i'll be watching... *sayang*... no matter ppl, persevere on ok? all of u can do it :)

ok... today mr. yang has got meeting so didn't talk much but was happy enuff to noe that i was able to talk to him for a full 45 mins before i met baobei shiqi for movie... man, i'm glad.... anyway, i think it is so cool lar. u noe ar, when i sleep, he is busy and when he is sleeping, i'm idling away. haha. but we get to talk at the most funkiest times of the day.

Interesting fact of the day: did u noe that USA is 15 hrs behind our time... cool huh... so that means ar... give eg. when it is 9am in spore, it is his dinner time, 6pm... haha fancy that, eating dinner at 9am according to spore time. funky hor... hhaha man, so kewl... heh heh... maybe one day i should try gng to antartica to find out the time difference there. for all u noe, the penguins may come up n tell u, it is party time!!! wohoo!!!

ok shall leave all of u to admire my precious baobei... tata love u all *muackz*...

PS. choose frens wisely, some are worth it, some are not..... open eyes big big and choose ar...

pretty pictures

pretty pictures...

some photos i took when i was in Fajar... heh heh my lovely bunch of Fajar colleagues...

Group photo...

This is Joseph Giri n i... lame. He just makes my day everyday in there. Strong brother too...

This is erman... very funky n blur art teacher...
hahah no lar, he is realli very nice. hor erman?

This is Eugene... the nice PE teacher.. thank u for introducing all sorts of farni games to us together with joe-si. if not life will be so boring without u guys. hahaha... man i miss those times with u guys, and u guys are so lucky to go back to Fajar.. humph... haaha help me take care of my precious students. thank u so much...

and this is me.... lynn helped me tie my hair into a french braid today before youth service. nice rite?... hee so nice, i also want to tie by myself.

21 more days...

21 more days to go...

man, it feels like a month already.. hahaha... will time ever pass faster... u noe ar, the farni thing about time is that when u want it to pass faster, it just delays and drags till the cows come home.. den, when u want time to come to a standstill, it passes like a choo choo train or rather in the blink of an eye...

Today Pastor Gerald led the youth worship service. it was awesome man... i think it was one of the best worship sessions with such an intimacy with God i ever had ever since i stepped into church. We had no proper structure so we literally had to rely on Pastor Gerald for cues to the direction that we're heading for. This is what worship should be so i guess the youths still have lots to learn. haha but of coz, i noe it can't be done overnight. so duh!!! but all i ask n pray is for a teachable and a willing-to-learn spirit as well as attitude.

yeah.. so lucky lor mr. yang gets to go to san francisco.. ahhaha. mummy said she wants the whole of san francisco so that she can share with zg... not fair lor. den me lei? muahahha.. dun worry, i own the whole earth coz i'm royalty. since God is King, den i'm princess. haha oops just following hierachy ma... hahha ok ppl, i got to go... gng to watch another hindi movie soon after i finish msning some precious person. heh heh... *winks* yeah.

Man... i totally miss Fajar Sec... totally

Life goes on........

hurray!!!

22 more days...

ok i think i had better clear what is bothering me or making me frustrated. it is mostly church related nothing to do with anyone or frens in other areas other than church. can't be bothered with trivial matters. yup.. it is more like a tugging at my heart for the ministry.

anyway, yest went out with Jonathan Tan for dinner coz mummy n daddy went to church for some church cell leader's meeting haha. yup. some pictures of my godbro n i... hee

my piggy faced god bro n i..

ok lar... i shall not be so mean.. this is how my godbro realli looks like.. quite handsome hor... but he very poor thing, always being bullied by all his gfs... *sayang* nvm bro, i help u filter out and vet thru all ur Mrs. Tan-to-be. hee

this was a pic we took at hotel intercontinental.. at the lounge bar... heh heh... yup, he's one of my good frens till this very day since secondary sch...

oh yeah!!! and i passed my advanced theory. woohoo!!! all i need now is to work hard for the driving test... heh heh.. thank u so much daddy God.. Daddy God, i promise that i will be a very safe driver. i will always drive ppl up the wall. now n 4eva alwayz... heh...

and yay!!! 22 more days to 2 major events, the welcoming home of mr. yang and the Youth Evangelical Service... which i hope by God's grace, will not be another performance by the band but will be a true worship session that will touch the lives of many others... and may they see, feel and know that God is real... amen!!

gosh 26 more days...

26 more days...

yay!!! the uncle yang called.. haha so exciting... oh well.. he has just left for the conference.. so happy for him. just awaiting for his return to settle some other stuff too lor... hee got nth much to say as my heart is getting heavier each day... trust me, it has nth to do with mr. yang's overseas trip to U.S. but i guess Chris, u noe what i'm toking abt...

it is like a bursting ball of fire struggling to burst forth from me... nevertheless, i must control my fury...

ok happy thots... must think happy thots... cannot dwell on saddening and infuriating stuff. if not, there will be no end... happy thots... haha. i noe!!!!!!!!!!! pretty pictures!!! hahaha... wait ar... (pictures are right below this entry)...

Today (as in Wed), i had a wonderful dinner with Aunty Gwen and my bro zk... we went to sakae sushi n den chilled at coffee bean... i tell u, we shared so much about our life and i would say she is one lady that i truly salute... she is a very strong christian... i admire her for standing her ground when the principals n values of God are being compromised. something that i learned. she will just speak her mind. i think it is essential that we speak our minds knowing that we do it out of love and for the good of His people even though it seems to be done at the expense of breaking them down or like the phrase, iron sharpens iron... it is thru brokenness that we truly learn. i've been there, exprienced that... nt a nice feeling but God is in control... a true learning experience...

Another wonderful thing that i learnt from her during dinner at Sakae was that she called the waitress by her name... it was an eye opener. i mean who on earth would bother a name tag and the name on it. but aunty Gwen did it. After she addressed the waitress her name, i realized that hey ppl in the service industry are actually humans too n they do have a name... It makes ppl feel important, respected and loved...

oh hahaha n the same waitress addressed my bro zk, "Sir, what drink would u like to have"? when we sat down. muahahaha... i tell u my bro, freaked out as we kept teasing him the entire nite... poor zk... *sayang* not bad ar, got ppl address him as Sir... aahhaah...

yeah some photos... man i think i'm totally narcissist... cool!!!

oh n before i end, i would like to add that the spirit of JOY n HAPPINESS is essential to the worship ministry... now it feels like it is a burden to serve and i can feel barriers and walls put up around each person when it comes to practice time or soundcheck... where's the joy? i think i shall unleash my happiness and just be myself for once instead of being so constipated, trying to be as sane as i can be... no more sane nat... i shall be myself for once... MAD!!!

Is God in control?

Is God in control or wat?

fine.. a little updates before i say what is truly bugging in my heart deep down within... firstly, today went by super slow.. i have no idea why lar.. maybe it is because, my dear mr. yang has left for U.S for a supernatural conference... very exciting... haha. missing him is an understatement of the mnth lar.. but on the bright side, i guess 3 weeks will go past very fast if i find things to occupy myself with.

luckily for me, my day started at 6pm, right after dinner where i had a jamming session with my bros first.. we played battle cry... man, it brings fond memories when we were in the other church... hahaa at abt 7pm, when we were quite mad and high my godsis, deniece came to join us in the jamming session... coz we're gng to perform a few sentimental songs at esplanade on sun... ok lar... it was quite gao wei initially coz suddenly, she can't flow with us n vice versa plus she brought her own fren in... hahaha. oh well, it was fun... after she left, zk, zg, n i had a fun time arranging songs, changing rhythms from 4/4 rock to funk to bossa nova and back to rock... had a fun time worshipping God by ourselves again. man, this is something that i miss.. to be able to reach, taste n God's presence. It has been a long time since i ever experienced a super high worship... which brings me to what is egging me in my heart the past few months...

sometimes ar, i seriously wonder why God put me back in Coos... tho i noe the reason but must He really do that? i enjoy worshipping together with bros, jonathan and barnabus... man that was the bomb man of worships... super high...i mean sometimes, i feel that we put God in a box... We play God instead. if u restrict God to what u noe, then aren't u God? when worshipping... one does not need to follow a rigid structure... Let God flow.. it is something that i have not been able to experience here in Coos...
and what is with the complicated song arrangements? half cut, here, full cut there? it just complicates things... no band dynamics? why? ask me n i will tell u how and where the problem lies... i can go on n on... there will be no end... i will say my piece when the time is ripe... for now, i shall keep my mouth shut.

What is worship and music? let me tell u...
Worship and music comes from the heart... True worship to God means u let Him take control... When the music or worship is in chaos, that is where God is happy.. coz He is in control. He can do what He wants... not some fancy band arrangement with wonderful techniques to make ppl feel good...
and music for worship? just keep it simple and lively with a balanced range of lows, mids n highs... with nice layering of instruments and creative but simple arrangements and cuts...
Who cares whether the song arrangment is good when the congregration can't follow? who cares if u got experience in playing with outside gigues or concerts... is the ability to play n worship God based on all these? if it is, think again.. u have got ur doctrine n concept wrong. wat rubbish...

u want a breakthru? sure easy... let God lead... apart from that... ATTITUDE is the key to everything... wat emo shit... emo my foot. trying to sound like a sonic edge band is crap pls. forgive me but we have to define our own style. u have a congregation, so adapt to their needs.. stop imitating other bands, get a life.

Where we are serving is the sacred, holiest house of God.. it is a ministry. dun take it for granted or assume it is a place to gain recognition. being in a ministry takes sacrifice n hard work n commitment... commitment is what i see... what is ur motive behind u serving in a ministry? define it pls. only then can u give God ur best... tons of things to be set in order in this house of God.. TONS!!! but who will receive n learn with an open heart n mind? dun resist God pls... a much greater work is gng to take place.. another level up into the spiritual realm is what i see n feel strongly in my spirit. a breakthru will come but it depends on how we work together to fight this battle... a servant attitude n spirit is required in any ministry... an essential one...

another reminder... dun use music to manipulate the emotions of ppl. i know and i can sense it when it happens... Beware... just let God lead... trust Him... and if u think u noe what is music n worship? think again...

today...

June 7, 2007

shall do a little recap here since yesterday i was not realli in a mood to blog coz was a wee bit excited. hee.

I am thankful to daddy God for seeing dot dot n i thru our drama auditions.. thank you mummy, chris, dotdot's mummy and zk for ur prayers for us to get thru it. thank you so so much... yup. after which, dot dot came over to my house for lunch and i experimented on her the cheese rice together with my bro. i'm sure it was nice, if not that woman would not have soaked her rice into cheese lor. i mean who would pour soup into a bowl of cheese rice? well, DOROTHY did it lar. hahah quite farni lar... it looked milk cheese rice soup or smth... *eww gross* heh heh... after lunch, we jammed n watched our all time favourite hindi movie. Kal ho Naa ho... so touching... I CRIED!!! N i got laughed at by my bro zg n my mum. so paisei... *piang*

anyway, dot dot is a talented drummer though... hee had fun jamming with her n bro... man i love my dot dot.

Today....

i had a fun time today.. spent time with mr. yang... lalalalala.... hee.. ok fine, i am uber happy lar but yet sad... let's start with happy k?

Happy bcoz, today i got to spend time with him after his 5 day trip from malacca n we watched an uber cute show called shrek 3 ARGH!!! baby shreklets are so cute lar.. honestly ar, i felt that the 1st n 2nd show were the best. the 3rd one was a little lame n predictable. it was the shreklets that made the show all worth it. but who cares... hee. i am happy.

Sad why? coz i have only 4 days left to see him and that hurts. coz he is flying off to U.S for another mnth. man!!! i thank God for the gradual testings and the little getting used to.. but oh well, i am strong n can bear with it by God's grace n dot dot's lameness and wonderful friendship.. thank u seng... heh. coming to niam u le... muahahahah... love u gal.

anyway, shall leave u a couple of pictures that the uncle n i took.. muahahah

happy day...

my happy day....

Firstly, let me thank my Daddy God for watching over me and providing me the entrance to degree programme at NIE and helping me at drama auditions today.. i was truly excited and grateful to Him. Without Him, i am totally nth... Nonetheless, i am thankful to you Jesus...

today's drama audition was quite fun. it felt like lessons have already begun. we were required to move our bodies according to music using body parts such as the elbow, legs and butts.. quite embarassing but wat to do, just whack lar, my life depends on it man... hahah..

Thank God that i only have 1 mnth to teach at Si Ling before degree programme starts. I still miss my Fajar kids so so much.. it hurts to go past that sch n yet noe that i am no longer gng back there.. To fajarians reading this, i love u with all my heart... more than u ever noe... :)

another happy thing is that my dear Mr. Yang is back!!! woohoo!!! get to hear his nice nice voice le... hahaha he reminds me of papa. heh heh... oops... haha. anyway, welcome home dear Chris... oh well, i only get to see him for say 4 more days and then he's off again to U.S for 1 mnth... another challenging feat for me. oh well, God will bring us thru it amen...

hahaha... ok tat's all folks... gng to watch tv now.. tata muackz

1 more day and counting...

1 more day n counting the hours....

so exciting... tmr is the most exciting day... firstly, would be the drama auditions which i pray very hard that i will be accepted. By God's grace, i will enter... Amen to tat!! and secondly, my dear Mr. Yang will be coming home in less than 24 hours. yay!!! and i am getting ready to nag him to the doctor's heh heh...

Oh well, was supposed to meet deniece today but we didn't meet up in the end coz it was too late n i guess she is prob tired after church camp.. and oh, i made a wonderful discovery... i love eating milo powder. it is the yummiest comfort food one can ever have when no proper food is in sight. hahha...

MILO POWDER MILO POWDER!!! YUM!!! i tell u i think milo has gone a long way back into history man.. from the nostalgic milo van to the milo can to the fancy milo drinks that we see in prata shops such as the al-ameen prata restaurant... cool ar, imagine that our humble milo drink turned into a star, popular among young teenagers and finding favour among adults too... haha.

Evolution of milo drink...

brings back memories eh?

queuing up for milo at the van

by the way.. maroon 5 has just released their new album.. I WANT!!!!!!!! i think the song is so nice lar.. their new song is so nice... is the title makes me wonder...super nice lar so must get it ok ppl? yup n when u want to buy it, pls think of me here drooling over their new album.. haha.. ok maroon 5, where are my fees for helping u advertise ur new album eh? hand the mullah over NOW!!! heh heh...

TAT'S ALL FOR NOW FOLKS!!! LOVE U PPL!!! *MUACKIES*

one simple telephone call....

hahah.. firstly, let me start off today's entry with a big thank you... THANK YOU JESUS 4 everything that u have done for me since day 1 of my birth till today. thank u so much... THANK YOU DADDY SO SO SO SO MUCH!!! Bless you so so much... :) it means so much to me. thank you for knowing the desires of my heart and many more!! :)

hee... God is so good.. yup, today i guess it was not bad as yesterday... partly coz i think i'm getting used to it le and also there's about 1 more day to go? ... but still weird.. heh heh... a dear person called yest and today, and hahaha i am estatic. Mr. Yang, thank you for everything heh heh... and if u're reading this, i'm awaiting for ur return for many things. one of them is for u to send me the pictures taken on last fri. hee...

haha... it's exactly 11.30pm on my lappie... and in half an hour's time it would be 12am, which means 1 more day!!! yay!!! God pls help me on thursday... i realli need you.. thank u...

can't wait to see shrek 3 man... i think donkey is so cute.. hahah says the stupidest things at the wrong times.. hahah that's what makes him a donkey... by the way, have u seen baby papa shrek? haha cute hor in diapers. heh heh... man, chris!!! fri ar, SHREK 3 YAY!!!! HAHAHA sorrie ppl, i think i'm on adrenaline rush.

oh and i must introduce to u my favourite show!! SPONGE BOB SQUAREPANTS!!! haahahah...

so cute hor!! hahha my gosh, i also want to live in a pineapple.. haahahah so cute... ok,

tat's all i got to blog for about today folks...

love u loads *muackz muackz* n take care...

3 more days to go...

I must testify of my Lord's goodness, He has provided me with a degree programme at NIE and i thank Him totally for taking care of me for the past 21 years and in years to come. Honestly, i would not be what i am today if not for Him, and so i am determined in believing that He has a plan installed for me to do works for Him. what is it, i'm nt so sure though i have my suspicions but whatever it is, in His time, i will myself to obey and to honour Him in every way that I can.

Why i thank Him? He has provided for me for my education, and to be so blessed to be able to further study... i am very thankful to Him. and so i would like to say a big THANK YOU JESUS!!!... what i am n have today is Yours.
bottom line is, always trust God... though it is nt easy but nv give up yeah?

gosh. it is nt easy when one is far far away from me.... *sighz* anyway, Chris left for a 5 day leader's advance in malacca... haha can u believe it, 3 more days... tmr would be 2 more days left before Chris returns. bet there'll be lots to catch up on and to learn from him. hee.. looking forward to his return on thurs. yeah!!! man... it feels weird not talking for 2 days... so not me... totally... heh. watever...

btw, went driving today, rained cats and dogs and i was busy trying to put a leash on the car. the roads were nt exactly free of cars when it comes to heavy rainy days. yuck yuck... i think nature is playing psychology too.... when u want it to rain, it shines so ever scorchingly, when u want it to shine, it rains cats n dogs... heh... maybe next time, i shall think of the opposite to obtain what i want.

yes!!! c'mon c'mon... according to my laptop it is now, 11.57pm... 3 more minutes to 12am... quick!! den it will be officially 2 more days... haahaa oh yeah and to drama auditions too.. so looking forward to it :)

love you loads readers!!!! *muackz muackz*

ps. dot if u are reading this, *reminder alert* thou has not tagged my bloggie for eons.... revive it pls. Angel u too!!!